I will never know exactly what happened the night two armed men grabbed me and tried to force me into a car because, while one of them aimed that gun directly at my face, the other choked me unconscious.
I remember being outside of my friend’s house, staring at their gun, focused on the barrel where, at any moment, a bullet could come out and rip into my body. They talked of raping me, once we were away. Of killing me. I couldn’t get in that car, but I also didn’t want to be shot right there. Struggling would get me shot, I reasoned, so I went with passive resistance. I let my body go limp, so it was hard for them to drag me across the yard. That’s when they cut off the oxygen to my brain. When I came to, I was kneeling near the road, and they were driving off.
I’ll never know why they left me there, just as I’ll never know what happened to me when I was unconscious. And, I’ll never know why I had those bruises on my inner thighs.